December 7, 2018
It was a normal morning in the Janis household. I was up pretty early because I had a follow-up ultrasound at 8:30am. This was to check on my ovarian cysts that were giving me issues this past fall. Jeff was up too and he was going to be watching Carter while I went to my appointment. Everything felt normal! I headed to the hospital for my ultrasound and was checked in right away. I headed down to Radiology and sat down in the waiting room, a little uncomfortable because I had to have a full bladder for the ultrasound! I was shortly called back by a really nice lady name Desiree, she gave me the instructions of what she would be doing, and then we were on our way.
Desiree had asked me a few questions as she was about to begin my ultrasound, one of them being, “when was your last period?” I said “Oh I think the first day was October 16th or 17th, I remember it was a Wednesday.” She started the ultrasound which first was just on my lower abdomen. I had mentioned that my cycles had been a little irregular since my miscarriage but I never actually missed a period until about a week or two prior. I had also said that my husband and I were trying again, but just waiting for God’s right timing to come along. I can’t remember the exact words because of the emotions, but I think Desiree said something like, “Well, I have some news for you.” I looked over, “Am I pregnant?!” She said, “Yep there’s a heartbeat and your little one!.” I then said something like “Oh my goodness, God is so good!! I think I’m going to cry!” Which I did, and just felt so much joy. Desiree called the doctor to make sure they knew right away knowing my miscarriage history, and then we finished up the ultrasound.
I’ve been waiting for this moment to happen again. I was filled with emotions when I was able to see our little one and hear their heartbeat. Anxiety for sure, but so much love and joy in the hopes that this pregnancy would go smoothly. Clearly I wasn’t going to tell anyone, so I decided to just write something in here! Once I do make it public I will post these little thoughts that you can read through, and then continue to follow along with my pregnancy. Saying so many prayers and thanking God in so many ways. I cannot wait to keep growing this little miracle. I got to keep an ultrasound picture that day, which was awesome because I was able to show Jeff when I got home. He was beaming, and SO excited for us. It was still kind of surreal that’s for sure!
December 9, 2018
I called the doctor’s office today to make my first actual prenatal appointment. We went over all of my medical history, and then the receptionist just wanted to double check with my doctor to see how soon he would need to see me. He had decided to send me over to get my bloodwork done, mainly to check my progesterone levels. They asked if I could do it that day it would be best.
I had just came home from grocery shopping with Carter, and I drove over to my parents house first. I knew my mom was home so I went inside with Carter and asked if she could watch him while I “unload my groceries and finish some laundry,” a.k.a. go and get my bloodwork done! The plan was to wait to tell our families on Christmas Day. Of course my mom didn’t mind watching Carter at all and said something like “Oh yeah take your time! I have nothing going!” (Lucky me lol). I got into the lab pretty quick, and got my bloodwork done. I headed back home in no time, and as far as I know my mom didn’t suspect anything! I brought Carter back home, and we went on with our day.
December 10, 2018
I had been waiting for the doctor’s office to call me with my bloodwork results. When the nurse called, I was actually over at my parents’ house and said to myself, “Crap! This is the doctors office calling!” I casually took the phone call in the guest bedroom, hoping they wouldn’t ask a bunch of questions afterwards LOL, which they didn’t! It was one of my nurses, telling me that my progesterone levels were a little lower than what they should be and that one week from now I should go back in for more bloodwork to make sure they rise up. I think at the time I was hearing what she was saying and responding, but also couldn’t help but think of all kinds of thoughts that I shouldn’t have. I had to take a few deep breaths to just kind of calm down and remind myself that everything is in God’s hands. The week went by a little slow, but luckily I had some exciting weekend plans.
My sister Megan, just recently got engaged and she had a wedding meeting on Saturday afternoon. My mom and I met up with her and her fiancé Collin for lunch, and then we headed to the wedding planning place. SO exciting!! None of them knew about our pregnancy, so luckily there were no cocktail options involved or that would have gave it away! It was such a fun day exploring options and talking all things wedding. I also stayed at one of my best friend’s house that night, Abby, because we were celebrating our other best friend Alexis’s nursing graduation the next day. Well, of course Abby and I normally have wine together so when she offered me a glass I had to decline… and tell her the exciting news! She was so excited for us. It was a really nice night, and a great weekend catching up with my friends that live downstate!
Besides the doctors and Jeff of course, only two other people know about our baby currently. I think this time it’s been one of those things where since I know how it feels for something to go wrong, I almost don’t want to share it with a ton of people just yet. I realize how exciting this whole thing is and we are beyond blessed and thankful! But at the same time, lately I have felt like if I didn’t have to share it, I just wasn’t ready to. It sounds weird. But I think if you’ve ever had a pregnancy after a miscarriage you would understand the feelings I have. So for now I’m keeping it pretty quiet.
December 17, 2018
Monday morning! Time to get my bloodwork done again. I actually had a facial scheduled for 11:00am that morning, so I decided to ask my mom if she would come over a little before 10:00am, so I could “go get my grocery shopping done.” Little did she know I was going to get my bloodwork done again, but I totally fooled her. It kind of cracks me up now thinking about it, and how sneaky I had to be! The hospital was really busy that day I was actually late to my facial! But luckily everything worked out with that. I was wondering when I would hear about my results, but just tried to stay busy.
December 18, 2018
I got a call first thing in the morning today! It was the nurse from my doctor’s office with some great news. My progesterone levels are nice and high where they need to be, and the rest of my bloodwork looked great. Such a sigh of relief! I then was able to schedule another ultrasound for the end of the week. I cannot wait for Friday!! I will be able to see our baby and hear it’s perfect little heartbeat again. This will also give us an updated ultrasound picture to wrap in a present box for our families. I COULDN’T BE MORE EXCITED!!! Tomorrow will mark nine weeks, so I hope we are able to get a cute little view of him or her this Friday. God is so good, and we are just so excited and thankful for this pregnancy!
December 19, 2018
Nine weeks today. NINE WEEKS! Another day to be so thankful for this little miracle growing inside me. I will totally admit the fatigue is getting to me and I feel like I could nap for three hours and still be tired! But luckily Carter keeps me busy, and I have been able to close my eyes here and there while he naps. I keep wanting to share the news with my mom so bad but I know it’s going to be that much more special by waiting for Christmas morning! I am really looking forward to my ultrasound in two days.
December 21, 2018
8:30am: I have had butterflies in my stomach all morning. My ultrasound is at 12:30 this afternoon, and Carter was up extra early this morning so it’s making the time go by a little slow! I decided to take the time to write while Carter is finishing up his breakfast. I’ve been feeling pretty good the past couple days, but for some reason today I feel awful! No foods sound good, and so I’ve just been sipping on warm lemon water. I decided to take Carter next door to my parents to sit with my mom (who still doesn’t know about the baby LOL). It actually made me feel better by going over there and just getting out of our house for a bit. I swear pregnancy can make you feel so yucky, but if you do just get up and move a little and maybe get some fresh air, it does wonders! Talking with my mom also made the time go by a little faster and Carter loves playing with the toys over there.
12:35pm: I’m all checked in and sitting in the waiting room, just saying my prayers and hoping for a great ultrasound.
1:20pm: Sitting in my car now! PRAISING THE LORD! Our baby looked great. He or she is measuring on schedule, and had a heartbeat of 168bpm. I am honestly in happy tears. Hearing his or her heartbeat was music to my ears, and we got some amazing snaps of our little one’s little hands and feet! They only look like tiny little buds right now, but it was absolutely incredible to see. I have so many memories from when I saw Carter for the first time, and was just in awe that God gave me the gift to grow that little miracle. And now here I am staring at my ultrasound pictures in pure joy just forever thanking God that he or she is healthy. The past few weeks I have been so anxious. I’ve had really good moments where I’m so excited, and other moments where I’m absolutely terrified something will happen again. But our full faith is in God. He has the ultimate plan for us, and we will be forever thankful for each blessing he gives us.
Ahh!! Now we wait a few more days to tell our families on Christmas the good news. I have totally almost slipped a few times and told my mom, but I’m so happy that we are going to wait for Christmas. It’ll make the glorious holiday that much better! I will be about 10 weeks by then. I cannot wait to finally share that we will be adding to our family next summer. God is so good!!
December 22, 2018
My gender predictions are leaning more towards a girl, because I’ve been feeling so awful lately! I had such an easy pregnancy with Carter, and this one I have been dragging my feet each day. Ginger ale and lemon ginger tea has helped to make it a little more bearable but I’ll totally admit its been rough.
December 23, 2018
Megan and her fiancé are coming home today! We are so excited to have them in town for the whole week. It’s going to make Christmas even more special. I am a little worried because normally Megan always makes everyone a good cocktail when she’s here and I’ll have to pretend to drink mine or figure out a plan to avoid that LOL! I keep wanting to just tell everyone, but gosh Christmas morning is going to be that much more special when they find out.
Update: Jeff has been drinking my holiday mules instead tonight. What a good hubby! Hopefully nobody notices…
December 24, 2018
Christmas Eve! I woke up feeling awful per usual, but I’m trying to just get moving because we have lots going on today. We have our first Christmas of the week with Jeff’s mom and her fiancé Brad later this morning. It’s going to be fun watching Carter do Christmas this year. I know he is going to love it! We also have a small present box for Jeff’s mom to open very last with our ultrasound picture in it. I know she’ll be SO excited for us!
Our Christmas Eve is coming to an end! We just got home from the annual Gracik family Christmas party which was right next door at my parents house. It was so much fun! Carter had a blast playing with his other cousins too. So I planned on waiting until Christmas Day to tell my family about the baby, but I just had this feeling that Megan for sure expected something was up. So, earlier tonight we were at mass and we had just stood up to sing the first hymn. I leaned over to her and said, “Okay, don’t freak out. One more time, don’t freak out. I’m pregnant again!” She looks up at me, and was pretty much speechless and almost didn’t even believe me at first LOL! The look on her face was priceless. I think she was also in shock, it was great. I knew if I didn’t try any of her Christmas punch at the party later she was going to REALLY question what was up. I honestly can’t imagine telling her another way now. I’ll always remember the look on her face!
December 25, 2018
It has been such a great day. Other than feeling sick and super tired, it’s honestly been the best Christmas ever. We had a blast opening presents earlier this morning at our cabin with just our family, and then we headed to my parents to keep opening. Carter was in awe at all the fun new toys he got I think! His favorite so far besides his Hot Wheels cars, has been his new slide and his play shopping cart.
We waited for my mom’s very last present to open for her to see my ultrasound picture and find out about the baby. I think I was so antsy and excited I totally forgot to have someone record it, but I will never forget her reaction. The only box I had left to wrap was a baby TOMS shoe box. When she saw the box she looked a little confused, and I said something like “Oh that was the only box I had left.” She opened the box, pulled out the picture, and immediately lost it. Honestly I’m crying as I type this thinking about her reaction. My mom is a woman of God, and she has been praying so hard for us. She knows just how much we wanted to be pregnant again. She was always going to church to light prayer candles for us. I am SO happy I waited for this moment. She got up from the chair and hugged me and we cried together. It was a very emotional and such a heart warming moment I will truly never forget. My dad was beyond excited too and gave me the biggest hug. They both know our journey, and to hear that there is a healthy baby growing is such a blessing.
It’s also a blessing that my parents know now, all the reasons why I haven’t ate much, why I’ve looked so tired, and maybe haven’t been as chipper lately! I’ve been feeling pretty awful, so it’s nice they know now and can understand. We also FaceTimed with my cousin Natalie today so we could watch her open her Christmas and birthday present from Megan and I. Carter had a big brother shirt on, so I couldn’t resist telling her too. I know she has been praying for us throughout this journey as well!
December 26, 2018
So I’ve started to realize how my morning sickness works. I feel awful when I wake up in the morning, and after a small cup of lemon ginger tea that does help a little bit. But then about 10:30am hits, and I feel like a normal person! I’m able to get things done, eat a little bit, and go on with my day. But then about 3:00pm hits and I slowly start to feel awful again for the rest of the night. Pregnancy does some weird things to you. But I’m hoping that the further I get into my first trimester, I start feeling better.
December 31, 2018
New Years Eve! We don’t have any big plans tonight, but it’s still exciting because every time I think of 2019, I think of our baby. I keep getting the urge to online shop for baby stuff, even though we already have plenty from Carter! I think I’m just a little excited. I’m still thinking it’s a girl just because I have been feeling so yucky lately.
January 3, 2019
My friends and I were texting in our group chat tonight and we kept bringing up when we could go back to Disney. I couldn’t keep it in any longer, so I said something like, “As long as it’s after July.” And I send a picture of Carter and I on Christmas with my ultrasound picture. They were all so excited and it’s been a blessing since they know now! They cannot wait to be “aunties” again.
January 7, 2019
So this past weekend, I actually felt pretty good! I woke up with slight headaches but I didn’t feel nauseous. It was a beautiful weekend so we were outside enjoying the snow and sunshine most of the time. I was very tired but I don’t mind that pregnancy symptom. But gosh then I wake up today and feel like I’m back at square one feeling awful! I made some lemon ginger tea to try and settle my stomach. But it’s another morning where nothing sounds good to eat. I know if I get something in my system I’ll start to feel a little better. I was just looking back before I started writing for the day, and my first post in this pregnancy diary was one month ago today when I walked into my follow-up ultrasound. I’ll still never forget that day. Every morning that I feel yucky is more than worth it. We cannot wait to meet you little one. I was able to get outside with Carter this afternoon to play in the snow a little bit, which was fun! I know he enjoyed it!
January 14, 2019
6:50am: It’s the morning of my first actual appointment! FINALLY! I’ve been nervously waiting for this day. Luckily I have a morning appointment so I don’t need to sit around all day worrying. I think I’m most excited because we will hopefully be able to hear the heartbeat of our sweet little babe.
11:30am: It ended up being a longer morning than I had planned, but that’s okay. My appointment was supposed to be at 8:45am, but my doctor was in surgery later than expected so I actually didn’t see him until about 10:00am. Jeff was with me for my appointment originally, but since we would be waiting for a little while I told him to head up to work! My appointment went well. I had to get a full physical and get all checked up. It was a little nerve wracking when the doctor got the fetal doppler out because we couldn’t find a strong heartbeat right away. We could just barely hear it, almost like it sounded far away, rather than right up and close. It took a little maneuvering which was a little uncomfortable but we finally were able to hear it nice and strong. It was 165bpm. The sweetest sound and a huge sigh of relief. My next appointment is scheduled for February!
January 18, 2019
This was the first day in quite some time that I woke up feeling “normal.” Normally I wake up and feel nauseous right away, but today I actually felt like I could eat something to kind of help get my day going. Lemon and Ginger Tea has also been a life saver for me! I’m hoping that it will only go up from here as I head into my second trimester in a couple more weeks.
January 23, 2019
Today was a busy morning, so I think because I had to get up and get our dog Bella to the vet I was feeling good! She had an allergic reaction to something and was all swelled up. It was actually a little scary! But she’s doing much better now. We got a TON of snow between last night and today so I was hoping to get some play time outside in it! It wasn’t too cold so Carter and I went out after he woke up from his nap. We had so much fun, and I got a good workout running after him in the snow! When Jeff got home from work tonight, we road in the UTV with him while he plowed the driveway. Carter loved that, and actually almost fell asleep! It’s so nice that I’ve been feeling better lately.
I think this might be my last post for my first trimester! This weekend I will officially begin my second trimester, and ready to hopefully get some energy back. I hope you’ve enjoyed reading our pregnancy journey so far, and I’m excited to keep everyone updated as we continue on this new adventure. We have been praying for this with all of our hearts, and are beyond thankful that God has blessed us with another baby!
Lots of love and God Bless,
Alyssa, I absolutely LOVED reading this journal! I laughed at me being naive in not having a clue and cried at the part of finding out you were pregnant! I am so excited to meet this little blessing in July! God is so good!
I was so excited that you are keeping a journal about your pregnancy, right from the moment you found out! It’s makes this journey so much more valuable for you. I’m so thankful that you are sharing this moment with those who care about you (like me who’s from Wisconsin!)
Can’t wait for July! She’s going to be such a sweetheart!