“To me, being a mother means getting to see all the possibility in the world through your children’s eyes, and also wanting to be the kindest and most generous version of yourself, so that your children can look up to you. On a day to day level, being a mother means being tired, sometimes grumpy, and never left alone, and then, in one funny, loving or meaningful moment with your kids, realizing that it’s all completely worth it. Times one million.” -Cara McDonough
With the icy weather we’ve been having the past couple days, I’ve been at home all day with the kids. We didn’t want to go anywhere since the roads were so yucky so we tried to stay busy around here! I was thinking I’d get caught up on the laundry and picking up.. that was just a “thought” though and never actually happened LOL. Even if you do not have kids, do you ever have those days where you wake up and make your list, feeling all sorts of determined to get a bunch of things checked off, only to find out an hour later, that all motivation is lost and you realize nothing is going to get done? I KNOW THE FEELING. And when you’re trying to do those things with little ones who want to paint, play transformers, change clothes every 10 minutes, have their fourth snack of the morning, and more, it gets a little more challenging! Sometimes when Jeff gets home from work, and the house looks ten times messier than when he left that morning, I feel so unaccomplished or that it looks like I have literally done nothing all day.. when really I was just trying to keep up and make sure everyone was taken care of. Thankfully, he is a huge help, and most of the time when he gets home he tackles the mountain of dishes in the sink for us, bless him.
The days that I am home with the kids all day when we can’t get out of the house because of the weather or someone is sick, etc. I have a good amount of time to think what we will do when our third baby makes their arrival. I’ll picture in my head while the kids are painting or doing a craft, “okay, so the baby could be napping during this time, or playing on the floor in the living room, or I could have them in the baby carrier while I help the other two…” I will also think I could fit that bassinet in that corner of the living room so that way I have a place to set the baby down when I need to help Payton or Carter, or get something done quick. I go down into the basement and see our bins of baby clothes and gear and make a mental note to maybe go through some of them and take a few things out to wash. Mental notes.. how many of those do you have as a mom LOL. Those won’t ever stop growing! And I mean that in more of a humorous way, because how many times do you say to yourself, “Okay, I need to remember to…” and then POOF that thought is gone in five minutes and you don’t remember it until the following week! Or maybe that’s just me!
The thing is though, I can have this entire plan in my head about what we will do, or where we will put things when our third baby comes, but when I really think about it, we aren’t going to know what is going to “work” until they get here. I can have these ideas of how we will do things, but overall? I just need to be patient and not get too into my head about it. No matter what, we will adjust and yes at times it will be a little nuts, but that’s just fine. I pray about this often when I feel anxious. I’ve had a few days lately where I’ve asked myself how will I do this or that with three little ones, and I mean that in the best way. But it’s not about being perfect, it’s about being the mommy that was beautifully made by God, for the little ones who are right in front of you already, and/or growing in your belly. I need to remind myself of that more often.
I lay in bed at night when everyone is finally settled down, and feel the baby kick and move around more and more. I cannot wait until we can time it for Carter and Payton feel them move too. Almost 23 weeks now, and gosh I get more and more excited to meet our newest addition in June!
Lots of love & God Bless,